In case the Final Destination trilogy last night didn't convince me, here's more proof that I can't control when I die:

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/08/health/08fat.html

"Except for not smoking, the advice for a healthy lifestyle is based largely on indirect evidence, Dr. Howard said, but most medical researchers agree that it makes sense to eat well, control weight and get regular exercise."

Most? Great.

"In this case, the study addressed a tricky problem. For decades, many scientists have said, and many members of the public have believed, that what people eat — the composition of the diet — determines how likely they are to get a chronic disease. But that has been hard to prove. Studies of dietary fiber and colon cancer failed to find that fiber was protective, and studies of vitamins thought to protect against cancer failed to show an effect."

Well fuck it. Pass the bacon.